I am on a never-ending journey of self-reflection, self-correction, trust and forgiveness. There was a time when my therapist asked me if I felt like I ever needed forgiveness and guess what I said…NO! Can you believe that? Well, neither could she and her facial expression when I answered the question made me go deep with myself and examine where my answer came from. The result of my analysis was that my answer came from a superficial level of thinking that since I never intentionally wronged anyone, I didn’t need to be forgiven for anything which isn’t entirely true. Just because I didn’t perceive my words or actions to be hurtful or rude didn’t mean that they weren’t and might have warranted forgiveness of me.
I started to realize that I wasn’t living because I was so busy trying to repel life from happening to me. Let me tell you where that leads you, to anxiety, emotional eating and playing small in your life. I had this fluff that I just couldn’t lose because I ate my feelings. Finally, I decided enough was enough. I have been working on getting my mind right for a long time, but I still wasn’t making much progress. I went into a detailed assessment of my life, what I wanted in my life and what I was going to do to get it.
The Mental Weight Is The Heaviest Of All
We don’t realize the weight of the mental anguish we carry daily. I had to face a lot of ugly truths that existed in my life. Fears, insecurities, failed attempts and excuses plagued my thoughts and paralyzed my progress and growth. Once I made peace with them, I could move on with a clear conscious and focus on gaining the clarity needed to take me where I wanted to go. Self-reflection is necessary not only to avoid making the same mistakes twice but to evaluate your progress and keep you on track.
You must find ways to release those thoughts that continuously swirl around in your head. This is the first step to healing your mind and freeing yourself from the baggage you carry. Here are a few ways to release negative thoughts:
· Deep Breathing
I started journaling and meditating daily. The effects in my life from these two activities alone blew my mind! The clarity I found and the strength I gained was amazing. I began to visualize and feel how my life would be once I had achieved each step along my journey. At first, it was so hard to do but with patience and practice it became second nature. Consistency will be your best friend in this process. You must develop discipline and commit to your journey or you will continue to repeat the same unsuccessful cycle.
As my commitment to myself strengthened, I added a consistent exercise routine. This boosted my confidence as well as improving my physical stamina and endurance. Motivation is great, but it will only take you so far. Your commit to yourself is what will keep you going even when you don’t want to.
With my mindset in a healthy place I could commit to a workout regime, nutritional and personal development plan that worked for me. I started making small changes and as I got stronger I made bigger changes.
The key is that I released everything that kept me from winning so that I could move on in peace and with a clean slate. You can’t step into a new vision dragging old thoughts, feelings and behaviors with you. You must release whatever has a hold over your life so that you can go get what is already waiting for you. You must learn from you mistakes and take a new path.
Trust and Forgiveness
This was a huge piece of my mental and emotional puzzle. When I was growing up, trust was non-existent in my household. My parents didn’t trust each other and that created issues with my ability to trust people. As I got older, my beliefs and life experiences took me to a place of “one and done”. The first time my trust was betrayed or perceived to be betrayed I was done! I thought nothing of this coping mechanism until that one day it couldn’t work and I had to make a choice to forgive or not to forgive.
That was THE hardest year of my life. Changing feeling, thoughts and behaviors that had been a part of my life for over 20 years was beyond difficult and many times felt impossible. With a lot of prayer, journaling, meditation, crying, dedication, determination and love I slayed the biggest issue to ever plague my mind. Working on you is tough work and physically exhausting, but done the right way, can turn your whole life around. You are worth it! Never stop working to improve your life.
Forgiving ME was the sweetest release. Acknowledging my feelings and mistakes, then letting them go was the best feeling. Releasing the mental and emotional weight is key to releasing the physical weight. If you don’t, your weight will return and you will remain in the same toxic cycle. What will you do to get started releasing your weight today?
As always, I am cheering you on!